Posted in beginner teachers, elementary school, high school, middle school, relationship building

Connecting with students

One big thing that has been on my mind this year is the relationship I have with my students. I pride myself in knowing my students well, beyond the mathematical skills they display and don’t display in my class. I get to know their family dynamics and remember details about them, but of course, I don’t know this about all my students. When my principal or another teacher talks to me about students of concern, I have details and valuable information to add to the conversation. But I know I’m not different from other teachers in this aspect. We love kids and love our jobs, so we do get to know the students that we see every day for 9 months. We think about them when we get home. We write lessons with certain student needs as the focus while making sure all students learn. We go above and beyond for them.

Relationship building is probably the number one thing that any veteran teacher would tell you when it comes to teaching. No matter the age or subject, the kind of relationship you have with students make a difference in their learning. This really is the best piece of advice and lesson I have learned. I love teaching math and talking about math, but it takes especial people like you and me to love math. Students, at any age, also need to “love” you before they can “love” math. They need you before they need the subject. I know that I am guilty of putting the subject before the students at times due to pressure from state test scores, my love of math, or even keeping pace with the other teachers. Just like you when you decided you wanted to be a math teacher, you didn’t do it for the love of the subject, but some teacher in your past inspired your love of math and your love to teach it.

Building a strong relationship with students is not easy and may not come naturally, but it’s such an essential part of being a teacher. But how do you do it and be genuine about it?

Weekly Reflections: This is my favorite way to get to know students. In one of my courses, I teach some of the lowest and behaviorally challenging 8th graders in my school. They are assigned homework every day even on test days, but every Friday, their assignment is to complete 3-5 questions about the week’s learning, the class, or themselves. They  know that completion is all I ask for and that their responses will not affect their grades. With that stipulation, they are very honest when given the chance to reflect. When they write, I actually read it, which surprises students, because they think they are only doing it fulfill an assignment point. Through these weekly reflections, I learn more about their learning needs and wishes. I learn more about how they feel about themselves, their classmates, and me. I learn how to be a teacher that can and will meet their needs because they voice it. Some examples of more personal reflections I ask are:

  • Why do you do homework?/Why do you NOT do homework?
  • What do you think of Cornell Notes? (We always do notes in Cornell style.)
  • What was the best part of your week?/What was the worst part of your week?
  • Rate yourself from 0-4, how well did you understand this week’s lessons? Explain.
  • What kind of teacher should Ms. Vang be so that you are successful this year?
  • What kind of classroom should we have so that you are successful this year?
  • What is one math goal you have this year?
  • Describe how you feel about math.
  • What are you looking forward to this weekend?
  • What can Ms. Vang or the class improve on to help you learn better? If nothing, what is something you like about our class?
  • What grade are you getting in this class? Do you think Ms. Vang is fair in her grading?
  • What do you need to do in order to get better in this class? If you are doing well, what is something you want to keep doing so that your grade doesn’t drop?

Because of these questions, I feel that I building a strong trust and bond between my students and I. When they realize that I read them and use them to better our class, they feel that they are being heard and cared for. They acknowledge that I am trying my best to be the best teacher I can be for them. It’s my way to give voice to my students, and through it, I know that I’m being the teacher they need for success. I do have rules for when answering the question. I don’t accept “nothing” and “I don’t know” as answers. I know that students can answer the questions even if it’s artificial, but even those artificial answers become more real as the year goes by because they know I read it. I do have students who choose not to do the weekly reflections or forget to do them, but I don’t worry about it. I just continue to encourage everyone to complete them because it is homework and that I am doing it to help our class and especially me be better.

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Author:

I have been teaching math for 8 years. I currently teach middle school math in St. Paul, MN. I have taught Geometry and Algebra 2 in the past. I am passionate about teaching math and teaching other teachers.

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